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When you numb the pain and discomfort, you also numb joy and happiness

This is for anyone who stands in the mirror each morning & only looks at what is WRONG,  has a bully for a voice in her head and who wants to make a change because starting each day feeling so unconfident and insecure is making it really hard to show everyday up as the person you want to be.  You know there is a boldness inside you and this weight thing is holding you captive.

You know you are smart and successful.  You have been successful in so many areas of your life. I know you, each morning starts with a pledge that today will be the first day, today will be the last time, today will be the day you finally stop, today will be the day you finally start. You tell yourself that you are made for more, you are made for everything in your closet to fit, you are made to make a difference in your family and community, but your inner voice each morning chips away at your self-confidence and makes it really really hard.  If only you didn’t have to overcome this each and every single day.

I know what you are looking for.  Each morning you create or recite this mental (or written) list of “RULES” of what you are going to do to finally lose the weight. They are rules of restriction denial and deprivation. You are giving up your favorites because they are what got you here.  You never need or want them again.  You can make this pledge because your will power is at its highest in the morning (and no one else has messed with you yet).  You set out to WIN.  Then the day happens, it is full, frustrating, there are good moments, there are hard moments, and you haven’t given in.  You feel proud, not hungry yet,  then the afternoon hits and it starts to fall apart.

The day didn’t go as planned, that’s ok.  Your loved ones are cranky and demanding, that’s ok. You have this set of rules and they are getting you through.  Then, it happens.  It is as if your morning mean voice and pledge never took place.  I know this moment, you can’t remember your intentions, you don’t even think of them.  It is all survival in this latter half of the day.  If you can just make it to bedtime.

Truthfully, this is where willpower is lowest, fatigue and overwhelm are high, and it is the perfect recipe for self sabotage.  I know the deep dive into food to numb, find comfort, distract, cope, and feel pleasure or enjoyment even if just for a minute.  In that moment, it is all worth it.  Until that moment is over.

One of two things happens.  You dust yourself off, feel the regret and pledge to do better or decide the day is completely blown, go for all the things you pledged to give up forever, and start again tomorrow.

How does that stop? How do you end that cycle? Can it be done?

Yes!  I was telling you my story.  I was telling you what I did.  I prayed and asked, and tried to find food peace for years.  I wanted to end this loop of self-destruction and horrible self-talk.

I know that you do too.

To be really simple, it isn’t about a fad and restricting.  It is about being practical and education.  I want to teach you to understand what to eat, when, and WHY.  When you understand you will feel empowered to do this (not shamed into it as your morning voice wants) then once you feel empowered you will be inspired to go out and continue making these decisions that are getting you the results you want.

It starts with an understanding that protein, fat and fiber at each meal are the building blocks to weight loss without hunger, rev your metabolism,& feel FULL for hours.  Fiber has zero calories but your body will burn calories trying to digest it.  Protein will protect and preserve your lean muscle (your storage tank for carbs) and fat will regulate your hormones, help you feel full, and regulate your temperature.

Keeping these basic three at each meal will do so much to help you become healthy, but for those of us who want to finally win at losing weight, this combination will do so much to help you have weight loss without hunger and rev your metabolism. It isn’t a fad, it is based on science.

What part of this feels hard?  Is it that you don’t know what protein, fat, & fiber is or which ones to have? Is it where to find fiber?  Is it how to eat this way and keep it simple?  Is it finding foods you like that fit into this pattern?  What is your hard?

It’s boring, unfancy hard and takes a lot of discipline  I get why putting in the work to lose the weight and keep it off is hard.  We are keeping it all together in so many other areas of life, we do hard things, we show up and work outside our comfort zone most hours of the day. It seems like we DESERVE to treat ourselves for bravery, boldness, courage, and showing up all day even though we are scared and hurting.  It seems reasonable to be able to settle into something that can cover the uncomfortable for just a moment and wash us over with a dopamine relief.  Can’t we just enjoy eating the flicking cookie?

When you numb the pain and discomfort, you also numb joy and happiness

You can, you did, I did, and here we are.  Standing in front of the mirror each morning, pledging to do something different.  There are words like today will be the day, this is day one, no more overeating, no more binges, no more foods that get me like this, I don’t like what I see, I hate my body, and and and.   Still…. At the end of the day, 12 hours after the heartfelt pledge,  the cookie brings the comfort, the numbing, the moment of pleasure/joy/tension relief or reward for showing up to this days BIG struggles with a brave face.

Here’s the thing, it hurts you.  When you numb the pain and discomfort, you also numb joy and happiness. Picture your pain sitting on a plate, and imagine that when you are comfort eating  the food puts a  bubble around the pain.  You can’t feel that pain (for just the time you are eating).  That relief and escape feel really good.  Problem is, as soon as you are done eating the bubble pops, the pain is still there, and now you have the pain regret.  You are smart enough to know that this will make you feel badly about yourself, yet again, when you face the mirror.

There was an incredibly short term relief to a potentially short term problem, that ultimately extended pain with regret over a decision you didn’t want to make. You had made the promise in the morning to yourself, but here it happened again.

If you don’t have your health, you don’t have a life.  I am certain you have heard there are no guarantees tomorrow and that today is a gift, but lets just for a second dive under that and really think about this.

You are here today because you are assigned to do something with your life.  I know that because you are this far into these words.  There is something that only you can do, and since I know you, your weight and the bully voice in your head each morning has you shrinking back, feeling like an imposter, and that there is someone else who does it better.  LIE

I do the unfancy work.  I do the teaching and educating to make this subject simple, so that you can get it. Not only get it, but apply it, use it, get results, and keep the weight off.  That part is important, because once you start getting and maintaining results, that mean monster bully voice gets quieter.

I show up to help you figure this out, so that you can scale your business, hustle harder, be more kinds of awesome.

It is hard to be ridiculously consistent with drinking water, moving your body daily and eating foods that honor your intentions. It will cost you showing up to your life, your grocery list, and that side of you that has the discipline (fight the voice that wants to do the opposite because someone else suggested the idea) you are only hurting yourself.

Copy of XO,

PS: If you are ready to get results, apply for Small Group Coaching today!  Slots fill up fast and are honored on a first come, first serve basis.

PPS: Are you more of a DIY person and want to learn without investing a lot of time or money? Start here:  7 FREE days of SOS (Suz on Your Shoulder).  It’s a nutrition course broken down into bite-sized nuggets of what you need to know.  It’s a daily audio message sent right to the text of your phone!

Originally posted 2020-08-05 06:59:22.

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“One huge, enthusiastic upvote for Suz. Her recommendations have helped me drop 45 pounds. She isn’t pushing products or recommending unhealthy fads, she’s changing the way you eat one two-minute tip at a time!”


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Suz On Your Shoulder (SOS)
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